


Human Touch

by Glitterwriter



Category: Adam Lambert (Musician), Tommy Ratliff (Musician)
Genre: AU, M/M, Romance, Slight leather jacket kink, Written for TJRBB
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-10-09
Updated: 2012-10-09
Packaged: 2017-11-15 18:05:23
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,578
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/530137
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Glitterwriter/pseuds/Glitterwriter
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>AU. Tommy was living for 2 years in Munich, but after a breakup he is moving back to LA. He has his last gig with his German band. Mario is attending that gig. He is gay, but he is not open about it, because he is afraid to lose his career. When he meets Tommy he is desperate and lonely. All he wants is to have an amazing night together and then go back to his life. It just fits that Tommy will leave Munich the next day. It’s just the perfect one night stand as it seems.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Human Touch

**Author's Note:**

> **Disclaimer:** it's just my imagination, I don't own the guys and I don’t know them ;-) But I own the story. Don’t tweet this to any of the persons I am just borrowing here. And I don’t know the places I am writing about, don’t judge me. This is written for the TJRBB and only for fun. 
> 
> ** A/N: **
> 
> Written for @maggy_97 [ here is the bunny she wrote.](http://tjrbigbang.livejournal.com/1871.html?thread=6479#t6479) Thank you! :) I hope you like it! <3 If you follow the link you can see some very nice pictures and gifs from Mario. She is also introducing Mario for those of you who don’t know him. 
> 
> Thanks to @valress for beta. It was so amazing to work with you and to get in touch with you. I really enjoyed it. And you made my silly little story shiny! <3 And of course: Any reminding mistakes are all mine! 
> 
> Thanks to my pre-readers @lovenhardt1 and @saar_fantasy. Your opinions helped me get over my stupid insecurities. <3 
> 
> A huge, huge thank you to my amazing artist @adobejunkie . I really love your art for my fic! <3 Please go and leave some love on her journal.  [ Artpost](http://adobejunkie.livejournal.com/11947.html)   
> 
> 
> A big THANK YOU to the mods of this BB. You guys rule! I got so much help from you. <3  
> 
> 
> And finally of course thanks to Mr. Tommy Joe Ratliff for being so inspiring and so easy to write!   
> 
> 
>   
>    
>  Last A/N: When I read the bunny I had that song from Bruce Springsteen in my head "Human Touch". It fits so well with his lyrics.  
>    
>  If you don't know the song, here is a [ live version](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P1Pq-rTylTw) I liked.

 

 

 

 

 

 

[ ](http://glitterwriter.livejournal.com/pics/catalog/270/274)

  
**  
**

 

_You and me we were the pretenders_  
_we let it all slip away_  
_in the end what you don't surrender_  
_well the world just strips away_  
  
_Baby there ain't no kindness in the face of strangers_  
_ain't gonna find no miracles here_  
_well you can wait on your blessings my darling_  
_I got a deal for you right here_  
  
_I ain't looking for praise or pity_  
_I ain't coming round searching of our crush_  
_I just want someone to talk to_  
_and a little of that human touch_  
_just a little of that human touch_

_Ain't no mercy on the streets of this town_  
_ain't no bread from heavenly skies_  
_ain't nobody drawing wine from this blood_  
_it's just you and me tonight_  
  
_Tell me in a world without pity_  
_do you think what I'm asking's too much_  
_I just want something to hold on to_  
_and a little of that human touch_  
_just a little of that human touch_  
_Oh baby that feeling of safety prize_  
_well it comes with the hard hard price_  
_you can't shut off the risk and the pain_  
_without losing the love that remains_  
_we're all riders on this train_

_Tell me, in a world without pity_  
_Do you think what I’m askin’s too much_  
_I just want something to hold on to_  
_And a little of that human touch_  
_Just a little of that human touch_  
  
_Oh baby that feeling of safety that you prize_  
_Well it comes at a hard hard price_  
_You can't shut off the risk and the pain_  
_Without losing the love that remains_  
_Were all riders on this train_  
  
_So you’ve been broken and you’ve been hurt_  
_Show me somebody who aint_  
_Yeah, I know I aint nobody’s bargain_  
_But, hell, a little touch up and a little paint..._  
_You might need something to hold on to_  
_When all the answers, they don't amount to much_  
_Somebody that you could just to talk to_  
_And a little of that human touch_  
_Baby, in a world without pity_  
_Do you think what Im askins too much_  
_I just want to feel you in my arms_  
_Share a little of that human touch_

  
_Bruce Springsteen, Human Touch – slightly changed lyrics_

 

Tommy pulled his jacket collar up. It was really cold. That was what he really hated about living in Munich: there was actually a real winter! And this year it seemed to start even earlier than the last two years since Tommy moved here. He liked Munich and it was his home for a while. Still he couldn’t wait to leave the city and his lost life with Georg behind him. It was not even about a broken heart, because his heart wasn’t broken. It was just a bit shaken, that was all. But he was lonely since the breakup. And now with the beginning of winter it was even harder to be alone.

Tommy shivered and cursed at himself for forgetting his scarf in his hotel room. He really thought it was warmer. The sun was shining over the roofs when he was watching out of the window during his breakfast. But the sun was weak and didn’t warm him up at all. He could feel the cold creeping up his body. It was time to warm up.

He looked around for his bandmate Matt. His real name was Matthias and he was their drummer. They wanted to meet and spend some time wandering over the Christmas Market, or what they called in Munich the Christkindlmarkt. It was his last day in Munich and he didn’t know when or if he would return. A new job was waiting for him in Los Angeles and he was happy to go back home. But on his last day he just wanted to drink some hot spiced wine, called Glühwein and to eat some Bavarian food. Just to say goodbye.

He saw Matt walking towards him laughing. 

“Tommy, you should have worn at least a scarf. You look like you are about to freeze to death.“

Matt hugged him and pulled him towards the market where Tommy could smell all the delicious food. Matt found a stall selling scarves and bought Tommy one in Bavarian colors. He put the blue-white scarf around Tommy’s neck.

“It’s a gift, so you don’t forget me. “ Tommy laughed. “I could never forget you Matt.”  They hugged again. When they pulled away Tommy felt some sadness creeping up his body.

 “I’ll miss you. I‘m gonna miss making music with you and the guys.”

Matt nodded. “Yeah, we will miss your crazy ass too. I hope we can stay in contact. And who knows maybe you will come back. And now stop this pathetic behavior and let us get some Glühwein. I need something to warm up and I guess you can use some too.”

They walked through the market towards a big stall selling Glühwein. Tommy let the drink warm his throat. He looked around and he knew even if it was freezing he would miss this. He would miss Munich. The atmosphere was so alive. It was a big city and it had some international flair. Still it gave you the feeling of livingin a small town. He found friends here over the past twoyears. And he had some favorite places to go to. He would miss the beer garden near his apartment. He spent a lot of evenings there. And of course he would miss the beer. It was hard to go, but it was necessary. He needed a change.

“Tommy, let’s go inside, grab some food and warm up. We need your fingers safe and sound for tonight; for your last gig with us.” 

Tommy agreed and a few minutes later they were sitting in a small tied house drinking beer and reading through the menu.

“I really need to eat some authentic Bavarian food. I’m not gonna be getting any,anytime soon.”

Matt was laughing when he heard Tommy ordering some rolled pork with bread dumplings and sauerkraut, and as a starter he ordered some Bavarian veal sausages. Matt was laughing about his ability to eat that much. They were drinking beer and talking.

“I’m really sad things didn’t work out for you and Georg. But I guess you wouldn’t be leaving if you two were still together.” Tommy took a long sip out of the glass and shook his head.

“I was pretty sure I would grow old here. At least until six months ago, but yeah things like that happen. I guess it was crazy to believe that we were a good match. I mean seriously, he’s a lawyer now and he is working with people I don’t even want to look at. So yeah we were good as long as he was a wannabe-lawyer, but now? I guess we both moved in different directions and lost each other. The breakup was just a logical consequence. It still hurt to let him go.” Tommy smiled sadly.

He came to Munich two years prior to be with Georg. They met while Tommy was working for a few weeks with a band in Berlin. He jumped into the relationship with Georg so fast, it was mind-blowing. But now it was over and it was time to move on. Tommy tried to do that while staying in Munich, but it wasn’t the same anymore. It was cold to be on his own again.

Tommy enjoyed the food and finally he walked back to the hotel he checked in yesterday. It was the same hotel they had the gig tonight. The band was booked to play during the Christmas staff party for the football club FC Bayern München. It was a huge gig for the band and it was somehow nice for his goodbye. Tommy took the elevator to his room. They had soundcheck in thirty minutes, so he changed into a t-shirt and some jeans and went to the conference room where his band mates were already standing on the stage. Lucy, their singer was warming her voice up singing some terribly sad song while making funny faces at Tommy. He pulled his guitar out of the case and started to play.

Yeah, this would be his last gig with this amazing band and it would become a memorable evening for him. He could almost feel it.

  
____

Mario was tired. He felt like he hadn’t slept in months. The season was hard and it was time for a holiday. He took one last look in the mirror. The black suit was really a good choice. He looked good. He liked to dress up; it was a nice difference from the football tricot.

 

He walked out in the hall toward the music. It sounded really nice. The management had a good idea to invite a live band for the Christmas party. It fit the atmosphere. He walked in the room and started toward his seat. He talked to some other football players on his way. The sound of a guitar pulled on him and he wanted so badly to sit down and close his eyes and just enjoy the music. But obviously everyone was waiting for him to arrive and he was talking to what seemed like hundreds of people. He reached his seat just in time to see that the band was taking a break.

 

Mario sat down and was talking politely with the wife of one of the managers. She was really boring and also kind of stupid, but he managed to keep the conversation going. That was until the band started to play again and he finally turned around to look at them. He stopped what he was doing and stared. He couldn’t tear his eyes away from the guitar player.

 

The guitar player had his eyes closed and his fingers danced across the strings. Mario let his eyes wander over the face of the man. He seemed so lost in the music, so relaxed. And damn, he was really handsome. His cheekbones were amazing. And wow, his eyelashes: how does he even have such long lashes? Mario’s eyes dropped to the mouth and he was a goner. The guitar player was biting the bottom lip.

 

Mario gasped.

 

He had to turn away and take a sip of water. Damn, this guy was just his type. He was small, talented and hot as hell. Mario could feel desire throbbing through his body. It was just too long since he’d let himself be with a man. He was craving the touch, and this guitar player seemed like someone out of a hot, wet dream. He drank even more water. As soon as he decided it was safe to turn around again, he was still there. But now his eyes were open and he was looking straight at Mario. Mario felt a blush creeping up his neck. He was glad that the lights were dimmed, so nobody saw it.

 

They kept eye contact for a long time and their eyes came together over and over again during the rest of the evening. Mario was itching to touch this man. He could imagine letting his fingers run down those finely structured cheeks and over those lips. He was curious to see the body under that leather jacket. The jacket was doing things to him, was giving him images of the guitar player on his bed wearing nothing but that jacket. Mario’s eyes were wandering over the body of the man and then back to those amazing lips. Just when his eyes stayed a bit longer on those lips the man poked his tongue out moistening the bottom one. It was for just a split second that Mario saw the tongue, but it was enough to make his pants really tight. Damn, he needed to cool down. Nobody should see him like that. He decided to go to the restroom.

 

He got up and walked out of the room. He didn’t notice that the music had stopped for another break. Finally he found the restroom and was standing in front of the sink. He turned on the water and let the cool water run over his wrists. He sighed thinking about the guitar player. Damn, he really needed to get laid. And this guy… he looked up in the mirror right in the guy’s eyes. Damn, having him so close was intoxicating. The look in his eyes was intense and seemed to see through Mario. He cleared his throat and turned around slowly. Wow, those eyes were amazing in full light; like hot chocolate. He couldn’t stop himself from licking his lips.

 

The man smirked at him and took a step closer. Mario could feel his heart in his throat and was barely able to breathe. Suddenly the guy was really close, pretending he wanted to reach the sink and his breath brushed Mario’s ear. Mario closed his eyes and inhaled the man’s scent. He was gripping the sink behind him to keep himself from reaching out to grab on to the front of the man’s leather jacket. His scent was driving him crazy. He wanted to touch so badly.

 

Mario heard the man chuckle as he whispered.

 

“I just wanted to tell you that I need you to put my clothes back on. I feel a bit naked.”

 

Then he pulled away and Mario could feel the blush creeping up his neck and face. This was so embarrassing. The man stepped a bit away and smiled.

 

“Hi, I’m Tommy.”

 

He stretched out his hand and Mario took it without a second thought. Lust was pulsing through his veins when they touched.

 

“I… “ he stopped to clear his throat. “I am Mario. You… you were really good out there.”

 

Tommy smiled even wider. “Thank you. I have to go back again, but I’d like to talk to you later?”

 

Mario finally relaxed a little and smiled shyly back. “Yeah, I would like that. See you later at the bar then?”

 

Tommy nodded and walked over to the door and just before he walked out he turned around to tell him with a smirk: “Nice ass Mario!”

 

Then he was gone and Mario was wondering how much more he could blush without passing out.

______

Damn, Mario was really hot. Tommy had to follow him to the men’s room, to find out who he was. He was not that much into sports, so he didn’t know the names of German football players. But he occasionally watched a match. How could he not while he was living in Germany? And of course Georg was a football fan, so they spent some weekends watching football on TV. He knew some things about the game, but he didn’t really care about the names of the guys. Even if he had to admit that some of them were really hot.

 

Tommy kept his eyes on Mario for the rest of the performance. And he could clearly see that Mario was watching him. There was something between them, some sort of chemistry. Tommy was a bit sad that they met on his last day in Munich. Mario was physically Tommy’s type. He was big, had broad shoulders and blue eyes, and he blushed so pretty. Tommy loved the mix of strong masculine man and a shy person. He loved teasing a guy like that. The evening was very promising so far.

 

Tommy was never that happy to be finished with a gig as he was tonight. He put his guitar away as fast as he could. The hotel staff would bring it to his room. Then he walked to the bar and looked around for Mario. He spotted him standing beside a table, talking to an elder couple. Tommy was not sure if it would be ok to just walk over, so he decided to get a drink and sat down on a barstool. He kept his eyes on Mario while he was walking around. Over and over again Mario looked at Tommy. He was getting closer, but it seemed to take forever. It was like Mario was doing a dance towards Tommy. The thought made Tommy smirk in his beer glass.

 

He took another sip and leaned back against the bar. It seemed like it would take a while until Mario’s dance would be over. Tommy smiled while he was waiting.

 

 

 

______

 

It seemed to be cursed. Mario just kept meeting other people, mostly women, who wanted to talk to him. He was getting annoyed, because all he wanted was to get to the bar and talk to Tommy. He was maybe also hoping that the talking would lead to more. But this “more” couldn’t happen as long as all the women kept him away from Tommy. He finished another conversation and was moving a bit faster towards a smirking Tommy when out of nowhere another woman appeared in front of him.

 

“Hi, Mario!” she hugged him and kissed his cheek.

 

He couldn’t stop himself from rolling his eyes over her shoulder. He didn’t even know who she was. He caught Tommy looking at him with a knowing look and he had to bite a smile away.

 

Just when he thought he would be caught in another boring talk Bastian Schweinsteiger suddenly came out of nowhere.

 

“Sorry, but I need to show Mario something really important,“ pulling him away from the woman and pushed him towards Tommy.

 

When they were out of earshot Bastian stopped and turned around, smirking. “I thought I should help you out, so you can finally get laid.”

 

Bastian grinned as Mario blushed.

 

“I… I…” he stuttered.

 

Bastian laid his arm over Mario’s shoulder and pulled him closer.

 

“Mario, I saw you watching that guitar player the whole night. Remember I know your type, he seems to be interested too. I know it’s been quite a long time since you had some real fun. So take your chance and go over.”

 

With that Bastian pushed Mario toward Tommy and gave him a slap on his backside. Mario turned around to give Bastian a glare, but Bastian just laughed and waved him forward. Suddenly, Tommy was right in front of him.

 

“Hi!” was all Mario got out.

 

Tommy was smiling at him. “Hi yourself. I was afraid I would have to turn into a woman to get a grip on you.”

 

Mario scratched the back of his neck as he chuckled. “I think that would be a bad idea. Pretty sure I wouldn’t be very interested in you if that were the case. ”

 

He looked around. “Sometimes it would be better when I would be able to be more open about who I like, you know?”

 

Tommy nodded. “I kind of figured it out. I guess it isn’t easy being gay in that business?”

 

Mario nodded and looked around again.

 

“You want to go somewhere more private then?”

 

Mario blushed more. It was so embarrassing that Tommy was bringing this side of him out.

 

“You have an idea?”

 

Tommy smiled and got up moving closer to whisper in Mario’s ear.

 

“I have a room. We could drink something and… talk?”

 

Mario was shivering while Tommy’s breath was ghosting over his skin. “Yeah, I would like that.”

 

Tommy smiled and moved closer again. “In five minutes in room number 3406? I will be waiting.”

 

Mario nodded. Tommy pulled away and then he leaned a bit closer again.

 

“Just make sure you get away from all these women.” He smirked while he walked out of the bar.

 

Mario looked around and he met Bastian’s eyes. Bastian was smiling and cheering at him. Mario smiled back and then walked to the exit of the bar. Surprisingly nobody tried to stop him.

 

Only a few minutes later he was standing in front of Tommy’s room and trying to calm down. He knocked once and was just about to knock again, when the door opened. Tommy smiled at him and Mario walked inside. Tommy walked over to the minibar and took two small bottles of whiskey out of it. He gave Mario one and held his out to him-

 

“Prost!”

 

Mario downed his bottle fast and put it down on the makeup table behind him. Tommy did the same. Then they were staring at each other for a few minutes.

 

“You took your jacket off.” Mario stated.

 

Tommy looked confused. “Yeah it was getting a bit too hot.” He saw heat in Mario’s eyes. “Should I put it back on? Would you like that?”

 

Tommy’s voice was like a promise. Mario started walking towards Tommy then, desire in his eyes.

 

“I want you to wear your jacket when I fuck you; only the jacket.”

Then one of his hands was in Tommy’s hair and he pulled him up for a heated kiss. Tommy grabbed Mario’s arms pulling him closer. It was messy, all tongues and teeth. Mario sucked Tommy’s bottom lip in his mouth, causing Tommy to shiver. They pulled apart for a moment to take off Mario’s jacket and his shirt. They both tugged at it, causing buttons to fly across the room, hitting the top of the dresser.

 

“Skin, I need to touch.” Mario’s voice was demanding and Tommy was pulling at his own shirt while Mario was kissing his throat.

 

After some struggling, Tommy was finally shirtless and Mario let his eyes wander over his chest. “Damn, you’re hot. I want to lick you all over.”

 

Tommy moaned as Mario got closer. His tongue was then wandering over Tommy’s collarbone and down to his nipple. He started nibbling his way down causing  Tommy to throw his head back and bury his fingers in Mario’s hair. They didn’t slow down for one second; hands grabbing at each other, pulling on pants, opening zippers. Tommy was losing himself in the rush. He could hear a voice in his head screaming: _More, faster, now!_

 

Finally they were naked. Mario took his time looking Tommy over, running his hands over pale, hot skin. As Mario pulled Tommy closer, he turned them so Tommy was standing in front of the makeup table. Mario lifted him up so he was sitting on the table. Stepping between Tommy’s legs, he groaned, the feel of skin on skin was driving him mad.

Tommy pulled him closer and wrapped his legs around his waist. Mario couldn’t think straight at this point. They kissed over and over again, tongues battling for dominance. Their dicks were rubbing against each other. Their moans were echoing around them.

 

Mario broke away to lick and bite along Tommy’s throat. He was licking down Tommy’s torso, nipping and biting towards Tommy’s dick. Without a warning Mario pulled away right before he reached it. Tommy opened his eyes to see Mario stepping away.

 

Before Tommy could say anything, Mario took his jacket from the bed and came back to him. “Please put it on.”

 

Tommy smirked as he pulled it on. “Kinky?”

 

Mario let his fingers stroke over the leather and he sniffed along the collar. A light blush started spreading over his face. “I’ve never wanted that before. But you were so hot on stage and all I could think about was how you would look wearing nothing but that jacket.” He growled and let Tommy pull him closer.

 

Mario’s hands were running along Tommy’s stomach and finally he took Tommy’s dick in his hand. He started to stroke him as he was biting and sucking along Tommy’s collarbone. He pushed the jacket down Tommy's shoulders, trapping his arms. Tommy wrapped himself around Mario’s body as much as the jacket allowed him to, touching every inch of skin he could reach. Mario’s movements were getting more and more desperate. Tommy didn’t want to come like this. He squirmed around until he could pull back slightly.

 

Mario looked up. “Should I slow down? Please, tell me if I’m too…”

 

Tommy interrupted Mario with a finger on his lips. “You can do me sweet and slow later, I promise. But now, just take what you need, I can handle it. I just don’t want to come until you’re in me.”

 

That made Mario moan in Tommy’s ear. “Lube?” his breath was tickling along Tommy’s ear shell. Tommy nodded and swallowed hard.

 

“I have some in my suitcase, I think right over there.” He pointed towards a black suitcase which was lying open beside the bed.

 

Mario kissed him once again and looked through the suitcase. He turned around with lube and a condom in his hands and walked back towards Tommy. Tommy was still perched on the edge of the table. He leaned back against the mirror and watched Mario with those intense eyes.

 

Mario’s mouth went dry.

 

He hurried back to Tommy and pulled him closer by the collar of the jacket. He licked into Tommy’s mouth and pressed their dicks together. He didn’t stop kissing Tommy while he opened the lube and squirted some out onto his fingers. With his free hand he pulled Tommy closer to the edge until he could easily reach Tommy’s hole. He didn’t waste time pushing a finger in.

 

Tommy bucked up and almost fell from the table. “Fuck!”

 

Mario grinned while Tommy was trying to find a comfortable position. He was squirming under Mario’s hands, gripping the table so hard his knuckles went white. Mario added another finger and after a few thrusts the third. “You feel so good on my fingers, so tight, so hot. I want to burry my dick in you. Please tell me you are ready.” Mario grunted, desperation lacing his voice.

 

“Yes…fuck, please! I want...”  Tommy whined as Mario pulled his fingers free and reached for the condom he dropped on the table earlier.

 

Tommy watched with hooded eyes as he opened the packet and rolled the condom over his cock. Spreading more lube over his cock, Mario positioned himself between Tommy’s legs. He put his hands under Tommy’s thighs pulling him closer. Tommy reached behind himself and gripped the edge of the mirror. He wrapped his legs around Mario’s hips as Mario lifted his ass higher, looking for a better angle. Then Mario was pushing in with a smooth, steady motion. Tommy gasped a bit at the stretch. It was right on the pleasant side of pain. Once Mario was fully inside he pulled Tommy completely off the countertop, his hands and dick the only thing holding Tommy up; this and his legs around Mario’s waist. He felt absolutely at Mario’s mercy and he loved it.

 

Mario started fucking him. His rhythm was fast; his cock was diving deep into Tommy’s body. The angle was perfect to slide along Tommy’s prostate. Mario kept his eyes open and watched Tommy’s face going slack. His mouth fell open and he was panting hard. Mario could feel his orgasm coming closer and he was so desperate for it, he could almost taste it on his tongue.

 

He moved even faster. His fingers were spreading Tommy’s cheeks apart. He let one of his fingers stroke over the cleft and he watched Tommy throw his head back. He could feel the lube smeared around Tommy’s hole while touching where he was fucking into Tommy. He could feel Tommy was getting close.

 

“Come for me, I want you to come right now.” He growled as he pushed his finger against his dick inside Tommy. Just like that Tommy’s body was tensing up and he threw his head back against the mirror. The force of his orgasm pushed him further onto Mario’s cock. Mario struggled a bit to stay  upright with Tommy spasming around him. He could feel himself getting closer to the edge. He pulled his finger out and adjusted Tommy until he was lying with his back on the table, ass in the air. Mario grabbed his hips and started to fuck him hard and fast. He didn’t last long and came shouting” Scheisse, Scheisse, Tommy, Scheisse!”

 

He collapsed forward against Tommy, but it was too uncomfortable to stay like that, pulling out carefully, he pushed Tommy up into a sitting position and leaned back against him, his head on Tommy’s shoulder. While Mario tried to catch his breath he could feel Tommy giggling and then outright laughing. He looked up at Tommy slightly confused.

 

Tommy cupped his cheeks and caressing his lips with his thumbs. “Sorry, but Scheisse? Was it such a shitty performance?” The smile in his voice let Mario know that he was teasing.

 

Mario turned his head and bit in Tommy’s thumb. “Yeah, the worst sex ever. I guess we should try that again later.”

 

Tommy snorted. Then they both started to laugh until they started to kiss again. Lazy, sated kisses that didn’t lead anywhere.

\-------

Mario was lying on the bed still enjoying the afterglow. There was something between them that made him ache for more; it made him long for someone like Tommy in his life. He hasn’t felt like that in a long time. It was hard to stay alone but it was easier than having a secret relationship. He didn’t want that at all. The last years it has been more about one night stands when the longing for a man, for some human touch when it got to be too much. But that was just not the same. And sometimes he just wanted to forget what he was pretending to be and what he could lose and just be who he truly was.

 

Before he could get too deep into hisdepressing thoughts, the bathroom door opened and Tommy walked back in the room. He was naked and some missed water drops were glistening along his body. Mario wanted to lick them all away.

 

Tommy walked slowly towards the bed and crawled up to lay down beside Mario on his stomach. Mario couldn’t resist and started to run his finger along Tommy’s spine. Tommy closed his eyes and smiled ashe let out a happy sigh. Mario chuckled and Tommy opened his eyes slowly. Just like that, there was their moment. Mario cupped Tommy’s cheek and leaned down while Tommy pushedup. The kiss they shared was so different from the ones from earlier. There was something underneath, something hopeful. When the kiss broke, Tommy looked in Mario’s eyes. For a while they just stared in the other’s eyes. Then there was a knock at the door and the moment was broken.

 

“I hope it’s ok, I just got us something to eat and drink.”

 

Tommy jumped up to put a robe on and get the door. Mario used the time to take a short shower. Then they were sitting together on the bed and eating sausages, cheese and rolls. There were some fruits on the table. It felt so easy to be together like that and they talked about their lives, their families and friends.

 

“I think I was never in the closet.” Tommy stated while he was nibbling on a pretzel. Mario looked up and Tommy went on. “I was just always gay and open about it. I didn’t have something like an official coming-out, you know? I just dated the boy I had a crush on when I was fifteen and that was all.”

 

Mario sighed. “Sounds nice, I wished it could have been like that for me. But I guess as soon as I decided I want to have a career as a football player, I made the decision to stay in the closet. I mean there is no way I could have both: a career and a love life. I don’t see a possibility for that. At least as long as I am active playing football.”

 

Tommy put the pretzel away and scooted closer to Mario. “So, you never had a relationship then?”

 

Mario shook his head. “Not really, no. I never let someone get too close to me.” His voice sounded so sad that Tommy had to pull him in his arms.

 

“I’m sorry for you. I could never imagine living like that. There would be a huge part of life missing for me. I wouldn’t want that.” Tommy said as he brushed Mario’s hair back, scratching along his scalp.

 

Mario turned his head away. “Believe me, I don’t want that either. I just don’t think I have a choice at all.”

 

They stayed quiet for a little while, both deep in their own thoughts.

 

“My family and some close friends know about it. They accepted it and I guess they would support me if I decided to come out. I am just scared and I don’t want to be the gay football player everyone is avoiding in the showers.”

 

Tommy nodded and pulled away from the hug. “I get that. But I still think that it will make you bitter when you stay like that. We all want love and closeness in our lives. We all want that one person to love.”

 

Mario sighed again and let his finger wander over Tommy’s tattoos. “Deep down I know you are right. I really know that. And a part of me is hoping that once I found that one special person, I will have the guts to act on it. Meanwhile I will try to survive as good as I can.”

 

Tommy couldn’t stop himself from cupping Mario’s face. “I hope you will be able to recognize the person once you meet them. Don’t let the chance go by.”

 

He leaned forward and kissed Mario gently. Mario wrapped his arms around Tommy and moaned in his mouth.

 

Tommy pulled slowly away to look in Mario’s eyes. “Now, you can do me nice and slow.”

 

Mario swallowed and closed the space between them to catch Tommy’s lips in a tender kiss. And when he pushed into Tommy again and they moved together slowly towards their orgasms, he couldn’t stop thinking, that maybe Tommy could be worth more than just being a one night stand.

 

Maybe.

 

___

 

Tommy woke up early; he had to get his flight. Mario was still asleep; luckily he didn’t hear the alarm on Tommy’s phone.

 

Tommy turned back to Mario who was lying on his stomach, his face towards Tommy. His lips were slightly open, his face relaxed. Watching Mario made him sad in a way that surprised him. They just met yesterday and still it seemed like they’d really knew each other; like they could be so good together.

Tommy cursed silently about bad timing. He resisted the urge to touch Mario and walked out to the bathroom. He thought about waking Mario up. Maybe so he could talk some more, maybe to get a last kiss. But in the end it wouldn’t change anything between them. It would just be harder to leave.

 

He walked back to the bedroom. Mario was still sleeping. Tommy took time to have a last long look at him. He decided to leave a note. Then he grabbed his stuff and walked out. He hoped it would be easy to forget Mario, just as easy as it was to close the door.

 

Maybe if they met earlier or under different circumstances they could find out if there was more. But life was like it was. At least they had this one night together. It was ridiculous how much it affected him that this was most likely everything he would ever have with Mario.

 

He sighed as he got out of the cab at the airport. It was hard to leave Germany, to leave what might have been behind.

 

He was walking towards the boarding area, when his cellphone vibrated. He got it out and saw a text from a new number. He opened it:

 

 _“_ _Thank you for the number and the night. Mario.”_

 

Tommy smiled. It was the right decision to leave his number. Obviously he was right about Mario and that there was something between them. He was standing in the line waiting for his hand luggage to get checked. He was thinking about what to answer when a new text came in.

 

 _“_ _Turn around.”_

 

Tommy turned around. He didn’t know where to look at. Then his phone started to ring. He picked up.

 

“Hello?”

 

For a few seconds there was nothing.

 

“ _Tommy? Look to your left.”_ Mario’s voice was shaking.

 

Tommy directed his eyes to the left and saw Mario standing behind a glass front. He smiled and Mario smiled back.

 

_“Tommy, I wish… I don’t even know. I just…”_

 

Tommy’s smile turned sad. “Yeah, I know. Someday, let’s just say someday there won’t be anything between us. For now I just imagine how it would be to walk over and kiss you goodbye.”

 

Tommy took a deep breath while he waited for an answer.

 

 _“_ _Tommy, I can’t promise anything. But I will keep that night in my memory. And I would like to keep in touch, if you want. I mean…”_

 

Tommy interrupted him. “Mario, I gave you my number for a reason. I’m not a twelve year old girl. I know life is not a romantic movie where everything works out eventually. That’s ok for me, really. Whenever you’ll be ready to be more, you know how to contact me. I just can’t promise to wait for you.”

 

Tommy closed his eyes for a few seconds. Behind him he could hear someone calling for him to move towards the checkpoint. He opened his eyes. Mario was looking at him with the same sadness in his eyes that Tommy was feeling. “Mario, I have to go.”

 

Mario nodded. _“_ _Yeah, I know.”_

 

Silence fell between them and Tommy had to look away.

 

“Good bye, Mario. Thank you for the nice time, I hope you’ll find what you’re searching for.” Tommy wanted to hang up.

 

 _“_ _Tommy, wait!”_

 

Their eyes found each other through the glass again.

 

  _“_ _I want you to wait for me.”_ Mario closed his eyes and turned with his back to Tommy. _“_ _But I can’t ask you to do that. That wouldn’t be fair at all. So I won’t ask you to wait. I_ _can only_ _hope you do.”_

 

Tommy saw Mario starting walking away. His heart sank.

 

 _“_ _I’m sorry Tommy. I wished things would be different. I wish I would be different.”_ He sighed and Tommy’s heart was breaking. _“Good bye.”_

 

Mario hung up and Tommy was listening to the dial tone while he watched him walk away. He sighed and turned away. A part of him was glad that Mario didn’t ask, because he was not sure if he would have said no.

\-----

**Epilogue**

  
  
  
**_Six months later_ **

 

Tommy tried to find a comfortable position. He hated flying and he had to find a way to survive the next dozen or so hours. He was on his way back to Munich to get back with his German band.

 

They had been begging since he left to come back and somehow he never really got back to his former life in LA. Now he was on his way back to Munich. He turned his laptop on, and again his thoughts wandered back to that last night. He couldn’t resist googling Mario.

 

He let his finger wander over the face on the screen. He could remember how it felt to touch those lips. How it was to kiss Mario. How amazing the sex had been. He wanted to close the tab again just when a word caught his eye: _“schwul”_.

 

Tommy blinked and it was still there: schwul, gay. He got curious and clicked at the link. The page that opened was from a magazine. There was a great picture of Mario sitting on a couch with a serious look on his face. The article was in German and Tommy didn’t know much more than a few words and sentences, so he let Google translate it for him.

 

The translation was not very good, so some sentences didn’t make sense at all. But there were a few lines that sounded pretty clear:

 

_“I met someone special. Someone who made me understand that I won’t be happy if I continue to go on with my life like that. I let him slip away because I wasn’t ready to be openly gay; because I was afraid of losing my career.”_

 

A few lines later he states:

 

_“Yes, I’m gay and I’m tired of hiding.”_

 

Tommy closed the laptop and took a deep breath. He was not waiting for Mario, not really. He was probably talking about someone else. He reached for his cell phone just to see that the connection was gone. He had to wait until they were in Germany to call Mario.

 

But should he even call him? He looked at the time and saw that he had a few hours to think about it. At least Mike brought him his cell phone to the airport after he forgot it at home. Tommy closed his eyes and tried to calm down while images of Mario kept his thoughts captured.

 

\-----

 

Mario was nervous, really nervous.

 

He was waiting at the airport for Tommy. And he had no idea if Tommy wanted to see him at all. The last time he saw Tommy things were different. He was different. He couldn’t stop thinking about the last conversation with Tommy. He couldn’t stop thinking about him. But he knew that he had no right to call Tommy, not until he decided to be true to himself.

 

After talking with friends and family about the reasons to do it or not to do it he decided to jump into the cold water and see what will happen. Three weeks after coming out to a magazine, he was still playing football, he had still fans and he felt free. He got some evil emails and messages on his homepage and on facebook. But it mostly went well. And the positive effect was that it started a debate about gay sportsmen in general. He was sure it was not nearly over and there would be hard times he would have to face, but he felt happy.

 

He looked at the screen to check the landing time of Tommy’s plane for what it seemed the hundredth time. He still had about two hours to wait. He was impatient and was grinning about his silly feelings.

 

 

He was scared when he dialed Tommy’s number a few hours ago. He was finally ready and was hoping he was not too late. Tommy didn’t pick up, it was a guy. His heart almost dropped to the floor. The guy started babbling on about how Tommy was waiting for the call and now he forgot his phone and he would kill him for spilling the secret out.

 

The guy was Mike and he was Tommy’s roommate. He told Mario that Tommy was on his way to the airport to fly to Munich. He gave Mario all the information and told him that he was on his way to give Tommy the cell phone. Now, hours later Mario was waiting and he was hoping that Mike was right. He hoped that Tommy still remembered him.

 

\----

 

Tommy was tired when the plane finally landed in Munich. He still didn’t decide what to do about Mario. It was months ago that they had one night together. One night! Mario was probably with someone else and Tommy was just being pathetic. He stepped out of the safety zone to grab his luggage. It was strange, but walking through the airport felt like coming home. He shook his head and started towards a little bakery on the side. He could almost taste the coffee when someone tapped his shoulder.

 

“Tommy, turn around.”

 

He swallowed and stopped. That couldn’t be! Then he turned around slowly and there he was: Mario.

 

“What? How?” Tommy dropped his suitcase in confusion.

 

Mario smiled and reached his hand out to touch Tommy’s cheek. “Hi!”

 

Finally Tommy let himself smile back as he turned his face towards Mario’s hand. “Hi yourself! What are doing here?”

 

Mario shrugged. “I heard you will be landing here today and I thought there should be someone to welcome you back. And I had nothing better to do, so I decided to pick you up.”

 

Tommy started to laugh at that.

 

“And I guess I owe you a kiss. So if you don’t mind, I want to settle the debt.”

 

Tommy smiled. “I don’t mind at all.”

 

Mario cupped Tommy’s face and leaned down while Tommy pushed up into it. When their lips met it was so sweet and gentle that Tommy had to put his arms around Mario’s waist just to have something to hold on to. It was an innocent kiss, only a chaste touch of lips. But the promise of more was lying underneath it when Mario pulled Tommy closer. They parted after a while and Mario grabbed Tommy’s suitcase and took his hand.

 

“Now, come! I want to show you off.” They walked out the airport hand in hand.

 

The next day Tommy was fighting with his jetlag when his cell beeped with a text. He opened it to see Mike’s face on the screen:

 

_“I see it worked out well for you.”_

 

He clicked the attached link and had to smile. There was a pic where Mario was kissing Tommy at the airport with a headline.

 

_“Is this that special person?”_

 

He turned around to see Mario still asleep and remembered the last few hours and knew the answer was “Yes”.

 

**The End.**


End file.
